reasonyouretellingthis””uhhuh
rachelifsheuld；butshecant”
”rachel
”nothisrachel”sheobickerandcarp”
”butshethinksshefeelsshesthoughtalotaboutherrriage
sinorethanshedid
arried”
”sheexpressedherselfplentythen”katherinejustshrugged
”okay；didntshesay”jackaskedwhensheshruggedagain；he
said；”icantakeitportantthingsshe
feltthatshelettheobytheboarditgoesbacktontrolif
racheluldseeyouintherehherfriends；shedprobablysayyou
ure”
”itrollingiealousinsecure”jacksputteredouta
breath”youretough”asinsultsen
plint
apparentlynotkatherineitfiredherup
”ivehadtobetough；beenlikeyouand
theyvealedosthefirstthingrachelandihadin
n”
”ahhhfelloanhaters”
”notnhatersalefriends”heuldnt
resist
”likeharlan”shestared”harlansupportsasigruficantotherwho
hasaidsheoks；edicalcarehe
rusheshotokelunchandhaspasseduptrainingsenarsinnew
yorkthatghthaveadvancedhiscareer；alltocareforhis
partner
youuldtakealessonfroarlan”forgetharlanforgeteventhat
youngguyin
………………………………
第46节
thepurplescrubs
sothingelsehadstuale
friendsheyisbenthesupposedsignificantotheror
isshedatinglotsofguysandplayingthefield�ncebued；teshy
kindofthing””youreafineootalk；”katherinesaid”there
youare；holdingontofavoritepicturesofyourexwifewhileyou
stringjillonfor；；tcallingthe
kettleblackshyouandbauerhesagoodlookingguy；but
allhighvoicedandnervous；thentu
tailandrun”hepaused；frojill”
”rae”
”thatsinterestingisshejealous””notonyourlifeshesbeen
thrivingsincethedivorceyouveseenherpaint
inthecitynoethingstifledherbackthereiwonder
�ndhehadsuddenly
hadlenoughheheldupahand”yourclientsysitinyourchair
andtalktheirheartsout；butthatstheieed；notnelifeis
notyourbusinessidonthavetodiscussithyou”
”sarriagelackof
nication”bothhandsraisednoeppedbackhe
toretutotherooregentle”runifyou
；butitgoaway”
”rachelandiaredivorcedthatsaboutasfaragets”
”isthathepasthatwhy
youkeptthosepicturesyoucare；jack”
”ofurse；icareiarried
fortenthatdoesntanineedtoanalyzeeverylittlethingthats
happenedsine；why
thehellshouldntihavepicturesofheryoudontnegatetwelve
goodyearsyoudontjustoffthescreenliketheynever
happened；andthatgoesforthefeelingsinvolvedrachelisseriously
illiereforoldtissake；becausesooneiateh
foryearsulddie
andbeydaughters；oneed
tending”
”thegirlsuldbestayinge；orhelizaorfaye
o
thehospitalthanthehouseinbigsur；butyouredrivingtheack
andforth；backandforth；tobeinthe”its
ithinkisbest；andsinysay”
”isntitalually；”heletoutanexasperatedbreath；
”noididntaskforthedivorceididntveoutracheldid”
hepushedahandthroughhishair”itellingyouthis
lifeisnoneofyourbusinessbuttov；t；ill
feelingtestyartedthedrivebacktobigsur；buttheast
diditsthingbythetitheypassedbigsur；asthadrisento
bufferhiroheorepensivethanirate
hespentthirtynuteshhislaptophookeduptorachelsfaxline；
andanotherthirtyhfayesbrisketandthegirlsthere
chtalkinghopeanthakeptlookingatherall
jackulddoosaytheoccasional”itllgetbetterthingslike
thistaketi”thenthegirlss；leavinghio
hisoselftoopaintinstead；he
duedthebagofilfroishouseonthekitchentable；andh
barelyaglance；threallbutthebillsthatdone；helooked
aroundthekitchenidly；heopeneddrabedthroughtakeout
nusfroestaurantsincarl蘒talian；xican；thaisohad
itecircledothershadfoodstainsallhadclearlybeenused；
hhangeinsanfrancis；rachelhadalookedshe
hadsaiditeshestill
ehadhebeentheoneinhehadalways
preferredhookingafterbeingahelhadokedhe
supposedthatuldbecalledntrolling
heflippedthroughrachelsil；tossingjunkinthebasket；putting
billsnexttohissanthahadalreadytakenahandfulof
catalogues
andtheonesthatostwere
foroutdoorclothingseveralistsgoodstherestwere
forgardensuppliesnosurprisetherenorinthecdllectionin
thelivingroooh；yes；shehadasupplyofjastaylor；van
rrison；andtheeagles；butshehadhalfagainasnyuntry
discs
hesupposedithoutdoorclothingandgardensupplieshe
supposedithauntrylifebuthehadnteventhoughtof
rachelasarontic
sental；andsensitive�utrontic
actually；nohathethoughtofit；sheuing
frobusinesstripohingveryronticrachelhad
pieitwas
darkoutthegirlsas；giggling
behindtheirhandslookingback；heguessedtheyhadbeensixand
four；orsevenandfive；eattothreeyears
before7；xthedivoresurrounding
thistrip
rachelhadbeenquietdrivinghiotheairportheissinga
schoolplayinhofthegidshadparts
”ifite；iind；”shehadsaidthenightbeforehe
left；butitdortanttridforhiandithadbeen
productive
thegirlsgiggledstoftheefroheairport”areyou
guysupto”heaskedrethanonce；toheyhadonlygiggled
re
they；h
scenerytakenrightfroheschool�asilydone；sincerachelhe
chiefsetdesigner�ndrachelplayingeverypartexceptthegirls
partsjackapplaudedroundly；thenreadgoodnightstoriestoeach
gidintuhehadthoughtthattheongoinggrinsandgiggleswere
silybecausehee
thenhereaandfoundtheplaceablazeh
daffodilsincandlelightrachelhadunpackedhisbagandfilledthe
bathtubhhoterandbubblesthereandles
there；tooandfreshraspberriesandhouteatingathing；
hefelttotallyfull
allthereetybyntrastnooreofrachel；he
toherstudiohislaptopoundof
bocapapertheheday
beforehadntvedhesatdo
afterabit；hebeganruagingthroughhersuppliesshehadoilsand
acrylicsintubes；neatlyarrangedonaerlorswerein
tinboxesbrushesofvaryinghslayonaclothhseveral
paletteknivesthereoretubesandt
………………………………
第47节
insinthestoragecloset；
plushertravelinggear�heavydutynualcaraandfilaportable
easel；alargecanvasbag；afoldingseat�lusasupplyofsketchpads；
pencils；andpens
thereetalfilecabiheopenedittofindher
professionalrerds�alesreceipts；listsofpainting
gallery；expenseres；sfroeracuntanthe
oneyshedehedidnt
toknohat；didnttoknohat
vinstead；snoopingidly；hepulledoutaportfoliothatashed
bethefilecabiandthealargeportfolio；
eitherinsizeorthicknesssquattingdoitagainstthe
frontofthefilecabi；openedit；andfoundasheafofragpaper
boundhathinpieceofblueyahepulleditout；untiedthe
ya；andsatback；restingthesheafagainsthisthighs
thefirstpageitlepagehoutatitlehetuedto
thenextpageandsaethingthatlookedlikeababyinthevery
firststagesofdevelopntaneryohetuedtothenextandthe
next；bryodevelopintoafetushfeaturesthatgrew
redistinctandincreasinglyhunthen；inantofsilent
violence；thesacholdingthefetusburstjackwasshakenhelooked
atitforthelongestti；unabletotuforhe
shockpassed；heon；andthenitheexplosionhadnt
occurred
thefetusgreoababy；nfinedinitssacbutin
differentpositions
ittleboyasfingersandtoesed；sowasa
tinypenis
again；jackudiedtheinfant；feelingtheutter
realityofthechild；thoughitorethanablue
penabluepen；onhighquality；heavyivoryrag
onlythreepagesreinedonthefirst；thebabyplylarger
andredetailed；tinyeyelashes；perfectlyshapedears；thuin
uthonthesend；hislittlebodyuedinpreparationfor
birth；kingbusinthe
sotheggshapeonthelast；thechildhadhiseyesopenandwas
lookingdirectlyatjack
sorealjackfeltachillonthebackofhisnecksoreal
sofaliar
tuingbacktothefirstpage；hethroughthesheafagainhe
feltthefaliaritybeginsoonafterthatsilentviolencebythe
tihetuedthelastpage；hehadaneeriethoughthepushedit
aside；gatheredthepagestogether；retiedtheya；andretuedthe
sheaftotheportfolioclosingittightly；hestasheditbackbetween
thefilecabiandthewall
still；hesathroughthenightand
atdainboca；
butassoonashehungup；thatbabyk
chingthegirlsinthecar；heheyknehingabout
ababy；butheuldntaskherheentioning
its
rachelknerachelsayingthatleftkatherine
chaptereleven
naturally；katherihehospitalthat
berfroachelsaddress
book�othnuers；estandingjustoutsidera；
hecalledtheberonhiscellphone
”lorandcut；”caabubblyyoungvoice
”katherineevans；please”
”iorryshesakean
appointnt””notforhair；”jackrerked
”ohuhthen；cansheretuyourcall”hegavethesyoung
thinghisnuer；pushedthephoneinhispocket；andretuedto
racheldrahiselbohebedrail
”so；”hesaid；feelingresentful”shesyourunofficial
spokesan
kethatspokespersonghtasicallyrrect；here
itlookslikeihavetogothroughhertogettoyou”hehalf
expeileofurse；thereh；
irrationally；annoyedhioreherubbedhisthuoverthose
iobilelips；foundthery；appliedvaselineexcessthere
othebackofhishand
”reeroski”theyhaddoneaspenandvailthey
haddonesnovictoria；
theonlygiftsfroerthattheyhadtrulyenjoyedhegirls
tooklessons；rachelandjackskiedtogetheronechapstickwasall
theyeverbrought；andtheyshared”that
raeitsbeenahel；a
aybehavingaballinthere；butitsgettingharder
onusoutherehopeneedsyoutohelpherhguineveresdeath
shedisappearedthising�idntshoandin
thehouseatallirantoguineveresgravenohopeiting
readytopanicedoduncansthatsstartingto
kenervousian；hesabigguylivingaloneuldbehesa
pervert”racheldidntlookupsetneitherhadhopewhenshe
retuedfrouncansjackhadchedhercloselyforsignsof
distress；buttherehif
thatstheextentofit；istillfeelinadequatealked
aboutreligion；youandybeaybethekidsneed
afaithoftheiroeslikethese”hestood；bringingherarbr 》
up；andbegantogentlyputitthroughitspaces”andsa
shesatripihavenoideasgoingoninherheadshe
vacillatesbetneverquitesure
hersheslisteningtoisayorhershesonlynodding
indisoffsothroughtoher”the
ringofthephoneuffledbyhisjeansgently；hesetherarbr 》
doly；heflippedthephoneopenasheothedoor
”yeah””itskatherine；”saidafrightenedvoice”sup”
”ineedtotalkhyou”therebeat；then；”rachels
thesa””yeahsorryshesthesa”katherineswore
softly
”eyoucall；pleasetellthetisntan
ergency”
”butitis；”hesaid；lookingbackathiskof
draudioofababyababyboy
”thesilencethistiorethanonebeat
”ineedtoknoeant；katherinethatbabyhad
eyes”thereoresilencefinally；sherredsothingto
sooneonherend；thensaid；”illbeoverinfortyfivenutes”
bythetishearrived；jackhadexercisedeveryappropriatepartof
rachelsbodyhehadtalkedtokarabateshehadtalkedtocindy
edpicturesofrachelto
aorethatthegirlshadpro
………………………………
第48节
duced；shohel
running；painting；laughing；furtherevidenceofthevibrantan
insidetheshellonthebedhehadlistenedtogarthbrooksfrobr 》
starttofinish；andhadaskedhielfadozenquestionsaboutthebaby
encerachelsbestfriendhadntdenied
katherineen
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